Seaons

March 6, 2020

I think I think
I saw
while out walking
the first browned autumn leaf
fall down from the oak tree
gently gently onto the road.
Summers end
the thought
instant regret
then the truth
seasons come and go.
Life is stages seasons ageing even.
philosophic outlook
enjoy the beginnings the ends the in betweens. Never having been this way.
Each season its own special blessing
truth and challenges holds
Gratitude for this thing called life
Tere

The ride

February 13, 2020

This is what I wrote after the motor bike ride you gave me:
Plagued by the unmentionables
Little understood.
Yet a choice
To sit on the back
850 cc travelling
Unexperienced pillion
Forced into the present
Moment.
Concentrate holding leaning anticipating
Forcing trust in another’s ability
Accepting the unforgiving reality of two wheels and road.
The challenge to do so in life.

Ticking

February 13, 2020

A poem of sorts.
Time
There is a time bomb ticking
Tick ticking
Click..yes it will.
Detonate.
For all there is a time bomb ticking.
Tick ticking..

Its been set it is ticking
Tick ticking.
No cutting of wire
No digital wizardry
Can stop the ticking
The tick tick ticking

Ticking

February 13, 2020

A poem of sorts.
Time
There is a time bomb ticking
Tick ticking
Click..yes it will.
Detonate.
For all there is a time bomb ticking.
Tick ticking.

Its been set it is ticking
Tick ticking.
No cutting of wire
No digital wizardry
Can stop the ticking
The tick tick ticking

Remember not

February 13, 2020

Sharlee aged 4 said to me last night papa if you make a wish to forget something when you go to sleep the wish comes true in the morning. Oh I wish that was true I said. I slept and remembered what she said. So she has a skill that I do not have. I wish that I did. And that is my wish forever . I wonder if I will remember?

Playing

February 13, 2020

(Something that’s been percolating within came to the surface while watching the movie calm skies)
I play for the audience.
The invisible audience.
Made up of whom?
Loves lost and gone?
Friends in name only?
Composite parts of those wishing to impress?
Mentors met and not?
Authors integrated absorbed?
The judge the critic?
Sometimes God even?
Most of all
it’s me!
I am that invisible audience.
I am the one.
Who understands, appreciates, applauds.
It’s me!
Not the others that count.
It’s me.
If played to,viewed, taken in can
Be the source.
Life lived.
Challenges
Exploration
to occur.
I!
I my own audience actor narrator
Til the end and beyond

Never know

February 13, 2020

You will never know how much I loved you. Maybe it showed to little. Maybe incapibility was the real foe. The death throes none the easier because of. Unskilled at stopping to love unwilling even yet to ignore hurts deeper than hurt. Quandary upon quandary
To speak quiet deep words of love no longer an option. Left with a hole a gap an emptiness logic defiled.
Would that history could change or future be shaped
But no. No….to go on…oh to go on over the bridge of dreams. I never dreamt that dream to mean this.

A friend

February 13, 2020

A poem freshly arrived whilst cooking my chicken only meal no carbs for me:
I like me.
I have just decided.
Oh yes.
Faults aplenty.
Shortcomings exist.
But I like me!

In fact;
If a friend I could choose.
I would choose me!
Yes me!

A bit presumptuous?
Oh no!
Good enough,
For God to like me?
Who am I to disagree?

I reach for the stars

February 1, 2020

I reach for the stars
but they are not there.

Empty spaces are
where the stars should be
bits of light
absent now

I reach for the moon
distant cold solace

The sun shines
day in day out
warmth of its rays
waned and weak

from deep within
only can come
the healed heart
to bring.

There is a healing that lasts.
endures.

From another source.
Not our own.

Humility
the
Call
Of help.
Answered.
To heal.

Father

January 30, 2020

I had a thought
One
Amongst many.
How am I seen?
Perceived?
Rather experienced as father?
Out of the mouths of babes truth is revealed…
Victorian awe and respect.?
New age open to all?
Traditional provider?
Me
I would like to be remembered
as kind.
A longing revealed?
From the past
A father
How may kindness have shaped?